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YES. VP DEBATE RIGHT NOW.

October 3, 2008

I’m excited, man. This whole thing has become the best Reality TV all year, which is simultaneously hilarious and really, really, really unfortunate. But that’s America, I guess, and now David Gregory is on, I’ve got my first Lowenbrau open, and the debate is about to start.

*~~*~** TRU LUV ~**~*~*

*~~*~** TRU LUV ~**~*~*

So, I know I said I was gonna watch CNN for the tickers, but there’s too many old uggos on that channel so I’m keepin’ it on MSNBC. ACTUALLY, YOU KNOW WHAT? They’re not even gonna be showing any of those uggos so fine. I’m changing to CNN. OKAY.

Senator Biden and Governor Palin come out and the first thing Palin says is “Nice to meet you! Can I call you Joe? Okay thanks!” Weird.

I JUST GOT A PHONE CALL. NO NO NO.

I really like how Palin dresses. I’M SORRY. I KNOW I’M SUPPOSED TO HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT HER, but her little suits and jackets are cute. AHAHAH CHECK OUT THAT TICKER COMPLETELY FALLING. And now it’s back up. Ew. She looks like she’s reading a prompter. It’s freaking me out.

MENTIONED THE “SUSPENDED CAMPAIGN” and the ticker goes DOWN.

Palin just mentioned how the people are tired of those “old politics, with all due respect” to Biden. She then went on to talk about how they’re so new and energetic and blahblah. Does she not know that McCain is about 3 heartbeats away from the coffin? I mean, WISH THE MAN GOOD HEALTH AND ALL, but he’s lackin’.

Why are the uncommitted Ohio voters loving this shit so much? I am really disappointed and worried.

Palin says she’s “not gonna answer the questions the way you wanna hear ’em.” Yeah, cos you’re totally totally good at NOT ANSWERING QUESTIONS.

BEER NUMBER TWO, BABIES.

I’m tired of all this dumb tax talk. I wanna hear about the bailout, cos I don’t think giving $700 billion dollars to the rich jackasses who got us into this mess is gonna help middle-class America. Just sayin’.

Oh God. This is killin’ me. I love how the women seem to be more receptive to Biden, and the men are more receptive to Tina. I mean Sarah. But overall so far AHAHAHAHA ULTIMATE BRIDGE TO NOWHERE. The supposedly silent audience totally LOL’d. Good boy, Biden. Sorry. OVERALL SO FAR it seems the ohio voters tend to like Palin?!!?!

Fuckin’ Ohio.

Palin says that the great thing about McCain doesn’t tell one thing to one group and another thing to a different group. Does she not pay attention to anything McCain does?

Xenu said, (0 minutes ago)

Sarah Palin is going to propose an energy plan that involves hamsters and tiny bicycles.

HAAHAHHA.

This is fucking ridiculous, man. She is spewing lie after lie after lie. She’s saying that McCain was the one warning people about the economy two years ago. She just referred to herself as a Main Streeter. THERE ARE MAIN STREETS IN ALASKA? WHAT?

This whole re-cap is so biased so I apologize if you’re looking for an objective viewpoint of this debate. I do not like Palin. I do not understand anyone who feels she is the most qualified person for VP. Don’t hate me, I’m just bloggin.

It’s really making me angry that she is basically, as usual, not actually answering the questions that she’s being asked, but instead continues to just change the subject. “Well, I’m gonna talk about energy now.” “Now, let’s talk about taxes.” ANSWER THE QUESTIONS, MAN. SERIOUSLY.

Biden on Global Warming: “If you don’t know what the cause is, it’s virtually impossible to solve it.” THANK YOU, JOE BIDEN. THANK FRIGGEN YOU. Palin said earlier this week to Katie Couric, when asked what she feels the causes are, she basically skirted the question and said something like that she’s not sure of the reasons, but it’s just something that happens and we need to do whatever it takes to solve it. YOU CANT SOLVE A PROBLEM IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT IS CAUSING THE PROBLEM. It’s completely nonsensical!

BEER NUMBER THREE.

Sharon said, (5 minutes ago)

Wait wait wait. Alaska sees the most impact with climate change. Did someone forget Katrina?

God, WORD. What the hell is she talking about? Because the melting of the Ice Caps or something, and all the polar bears dying? SHE EATS POLAR BEARS FOR BREAKFAST, PEOPLE.

The meter goes up when Palin says that she does not support the definition of Marriage as anything but between a Man and a Woman, and that really upsets me.

Oh man, I hafta break the seal but I do not wanna miss anything. I AM DOING THE “GOTTA GO” DANCE.

Oh awesome, they’re moving onto the threats presented by Iran and Pakistan. I am so not into this. Meter goes WAY UP talking about Pakistan weaponry. Biden says we should be building schools in that region. I kinda agree with that. I GUESS. OKAY SO PALIN ACTUALLY PRONOUNCED ACHMADENIJAD CORRECTLY. Good girl. Better than McCain did.

Well, she referred to her campaign as a McCain / Palin administration. That’s a plus from LAST WEEK.

Not gonna lie, folks. I’m a bit of a lightweight and I’m losin focus with the three beers. BUT I’M HERE FOR YOU OKAY? hahaahahah.

Palin: “There have been huge blenders within this administration”?????? OH. BLUNDERS. Her accent is whack, man.

Biden is saying that he hasn’t heard anything about how McCains policy on any topic is different than W’s. COMPLETELY AGREED. The meter spikes during that segment, but you know, the meter spikes at this point during friggen EVERYTHING, so who even cares about Uncommitted Ohio Voters? The candidates might, but I sure don’t.

Okay guys, I’ve heard Joe Biden talk about himself in the third person TWICE already. That’s TWO MORE DRINKS. And he keeps repeating himself. THREE WEEKS IN IRAQ. SIX AND A HALF IN AFGHANISTAN.

mizsarah said, (1 hour ago)

He talked about himself in the third person, though. Who does he think he is, Suede?

Gravel Blood Palin said, (1 hour ago)TALKING IN THIRD PERSON. TAKE A DRINK.

We can see where MY priorities lie.

Oh I forgot to write it up there but BEER NUMBA FOOOOUR. I think I’m gonna cap it at four, honestly.

Palin is chortlin’ to heself when Biden says DICK LUGER. ahahahaah. Oh, lawd. Oh great. Now she’s referring to herself as a Washington outsider. Dudes, she’s like a friggen EARTH outsider or something omg.

Xenu said, (2 minutes ago)

I think that Sarah Palin thinks she’s starring in a new version of “Mr. Smith goes to Washington.”

Gravel Blood Palin said, (0 minutes ago)

more like.. ERNEST GOES TO WASHINGTON

Oh lawd. Palin just said “THERE’YA GO, JOE.” Come on. I thought we were gonna turn off the cute for this debate, man.

Okay, I agree with her saying that No Child Left Behind isn’t doing it’s job. She didn’t exactly elaborate on her stance on that program, but I am over it. Both of my parents are school teachers. Some children DESERVE to be left behind, okay?

HAHAHA. Palin makes fun of the whole “not knowing what the VP does” thing. She’s damn charming, I’ll give her that. She’s a SNAKE and a TROLL and an EVIL PERSON, but she’s damn charming. UGH.

Biden says that Dick Cheney is the most dangerous VP we’ve ever had in American History. HELLS YES. That is, unless Palin get’s elected. Then we’re in biiiiig trouble. DO YOU HEAR ME, AMERICA?

You know, at this point, my friends on GTI are covering this crap a whole lot better than I am, although Biden just kinda choked and it made me really really drunkenly sad:

Matthew said, (2 minutes ago)

stop. fucking. winking.

Machined said, (1 minute ago)

she’s hitting on all the men in america

Xenu said, (3 minutes ago)

A huge state… that’s so meagerly populated that they PAY PEOPLE TO LIVE THERE. Give it up, Sarah.

Sharon said, (0 minutes ago)

YES – Biden’s playing the personal history card! Take that Sarah. His sob story is BETTER.

Matthew said, (0 minutes ago)

Don’t cry Joe… don’t show her any weakness… she’ll skin ya alive!

I love those freaks.

Biden: There is a need for FUNdamental change. THAT’S RIGHT. PARTY-CHANGE CAN BE FUNNNNNNNN.

I’m inebriated.

Aaaahahaha Chris Matthews says the whole Palin thing sounded really really recited, like a SPELLING BEE. I completely agree. It was better than last week, but it wasn’t at all spontaneous. It’s as if someone handed her a cheat sheet with all the questions for the night and she just memorized them. She was better than she’s been acting as of late in the one-on-ones, but she wasn’t at all natural, which is what people supposedly love her for. I don’t know. I don’t love her for anything more than her cute jackets, but that’s just me.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. sparky permalink
    October 3, 2008 2:47 pm

    I’ve really gotta know. What the hell happened to your country that led anybody there to actually take McCain and Palin seriously? I mean, really, Are you guys going to vote them in, wait a few months, then go “HA HA HA, WORLD! APRIL FOOLS!”

  2. October 8, 2008 5:51 pm

    I wonder the same thing every day.

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