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The INSTANT Bradley Cooper/TV on the Radio Review

February 8, 2009

Well, it’s been awhile since I’ve been able to do one of these live. Family events and laundry obligations have allowed me to be at home for this one, and excited I am, for Bradley Cooper is kind of a babe. And TV On the Radio had one of the best albums of last year — according to almost every music magazine/website/etc. — though I have listened to none of it. So, let’s see what happens..

Cold Open: Harry Reid & Nancy Pelosi talking about the stimulus. I’m not going to say anything until I actually find something funny. Yeah, that sketch pretty much went as I thought it would. That’s all I really have to say about that.

I feel like the cast is so tiny these days. Maybe it’s just because all of the heavy hitters are gone. I don’t know.

Monologue: Bradley Cooper dances out on stage. Well, at least he’s enthusiastic. Or on all kinds of drugs. Oh wow, Bradley Cooper was in the audience of Inside the Actor’s Studio many, many times looking like a creepy stalker. I will carefully take notes on the ways to be a bully. Cooper almost went all Christian Bale on Andy Samberg there. Random James Lipton alert! I should’e seen this coming, and I totally didn’t. I just cracked my neck, and I’m not sure anyone was intimidated. Though.. I’m alone.

The Today Show: So, I don’t know anything about Hoda Kotb or Kathie Lee Gifford, but this sketch got old the first minue of it in the Neil Patrick Harris episode, and it got old within the first ten seconds of this one. Cause, doing the silent laugh every five seconds if humour now, apparently. Oh, good, make fun of the Snuggie. Because it’s ridiculous. JUST GET A ROBE AND PUT IT ON BACKWARDS. I want to know how many Snuggie’s have been sold. Bale Wails: Un-Christian Behavior is a good tag. Was that real? I was about to say that Michaela’s mug is clearly empty, and then Kristen turned her mug upside down. Hee. Who is Mr. B? I’ve never heard of this person before. Are they real? And how is Bradley Cooper still good looking in this outfit?

I’m Gonna Have Sex With Your Wife: I’m so confused by this, but man, Will Forte’s expression is great. Aw, Fred’s expression is good, too. This is pointless, but I kind of like it. Oh, returning champion. That’s why Hader’s expression was so bad to begin with. Kristen gets to come back and have sex with him again next eek!

Digital Short: Jorma! Aw, I like it when they use the Lonely Island dudes in digital shorts. Okay, I love this. Easily. I want to have an “I’m on a Boat” press conference. But I’d rather hang out with poor Jorms. Nautical theme pashmina afghan! Topless mermaids! Boats! Burgers! Jorma being lonely! It’s really weird to see Akiva Schaffer on screen. He usually just is all directory. T-Pain, I hate you, but you funny.

Jonathan: I kind of knew they were going to do this sketch tonight. Bradley Cooper is totally a four dudes kind of guy. Oh sweet! They gave Sudeikis all the extra singing lines, because he’s fantastic. Sudeikis should make a CD. My roommate says she would listen to it everyday. I would, too. So soothing and wonderful. Particularly if there was video and he made those funny faces. So who’s going to die at the end of the sketch? Bill Hader? They are dancing like WHOA. So the reveal was that they were at a funeral? Because that was pretty obvious right away.

TV On the Radio – “Golden Age”: Not only have I not listened to TV on the Radio, I also haven’t seen Rachel Getting Married yet. Sorry, critically acclaimed band with newly movie starred singer. Tunde Adebimpe is a fascinating dude, though. You should read about him sometimes. Hey, that’s an Obama shirt, Bradley Cooper. This song is all over the place, and I’m not into it. I am curious to hear what it sounds like albumwise, though, because it’s pretty interesting.

Weekend Update: Looking at 780billion with all of those zeros just makes me realize exactly how big of a number that is. Nobody ever wants to hear “Nancy Pelosi” and “orgasm” together. George W. Bush broke the world! Mark Spitz. Hey, Andy Samberg’s nipples. Although, with all that potentially (probably?) fake chest hair, those are potentially fake nipples. Mark Spitz wouldn’t be this funny. Remember how much of a grump he was during the Olympics? James Harrison wasn’t really out of breathe when he started punching that Arizona Cardinals dude, though watching him get oxygen on the sidelines right after the play WAS hilarious. Really with Seth and not Amy is sad. But oh wow, that was fantastic. Really. Way to go, Seth. I actually applauded when that ended. Zing! Seriously, though. “You can smoke pot after winning 12 gold medals for your country” and “You’re a dick.” Phenomenal. I want to watch it multiple times.

Kristen Wiig does a decent Bjork impression, except that she looks nothing like her, and I wouldn’t guess that was Bjork just from looking at her. Make-up at SNL has really been slacking or something later. I want to go to Iceland, but I don’t want to give anyone my eyes.

Locker Room: Oh, please don’t let this be that sketch where they dance with Will Forte to the awul song. Oh, Bobby Moynihan. Good. Probably isn’t. Will Forte’s hat hair is great. Why do these hockey players have programs and foam fingers in their lockers? I’m so in love with Bradley Cooper’s moustache. And his unfortunate failure to impress that kid. The five second Darrell cameo! Hooray! You earn that paycheck, Hammond!

Bad Guys Good Conversation: Haha! Bradley Cooper does kind of look like Johnny from Karate Kid. That is a large forehead, Bill Hader. So random. Soooo random. “I don’t consider myself bad; I’m just a prick.” She was very, very unkind to a rabbit. And Buffalo Bill is just nuts.

Intervention: Random Wheel of Fortune relative, okay. Why does Will Forte look so old while Casey Wilson looks normal? Same for Kristen and Bradley Cooper. He looks normal and she looks older. Who has antibacterial that makes noises like that? Wow, what a gag, everyone. Okay, lotion makes noise now, and Bradley Cooper is rubbing it on his legs. I love mustard, too. I had a hot dog today. Without mustard. It wasn’t as good as it would be otherwise. Churn that butter! I bring air mattresses with me wherever I go, too.

At this point, I really just want this episode to be over. It’s not amusing me that much, and it seems so long. I’m just bored. And I’m tired of seeing this Blinds to Go comercial.

TV On the Radio “Dancing Choose”: This is better than the first song, but I’m still not really into it. I knew there was a reason that I didn’t really listen to them, even after I heard all of the acclaim for Dear Science, I still didn’t really look into hearing more. This is kind of proving why to me. Maybe I’m wrong. Prove me wrong, somebody.

Christian Bale: Who knew Bradley Cooper could do an accent so well? I’m glad they went for it, they could’ve totally done a normal accent and called it method acting. Because that’s what he does. The Soup already did something like this – the Christian Bale tirade CD. Bradley Cooper’s hair is falling out of his wig. Thanks, HD. I kind of agree with Bale’s freakout, to be honest. That’s a ton of money wasted. I mean, he was ridiculous and out of line, of course, but why was the dude walking into a shot anyways? Abby Elliott does a good Joan Cusack. I’m impressed with her on a weekly basis. Or on a five second basis, since she gets no airtime.

Closing: Meh. I was pretty bored through most of it. Bradley Cooper is handsome. Who is Jane Krasinski? And why does she need to get better soon? And why is Drew Barrymore on stage? Wtf? Did she get cut out of something? Is that what Bill Hader and Andy Samberg are discussing so intently back there?

And yes, I am excited about Alec Baldwin and the Jonas Brothers. I won’t be liveblogging next week, as I will be on a secret covert operation. So.. we’ll continue eventually.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. amanda permalink
    February 8, 2009 2:23 am

    Maybe he said Jane Krakowski and we just heard it wrong and mashed together John Krasinski and Jane Krakowski?

  2. Leeanne permalink
    February 8, 2009 7:35 pm

    I agree I was looking forward to this episode and was disappointed. The only saving point was that Bradley Cooper did look good. I thought they should have done the Christian Bale thing earlier because it was the only one that I was like that is semi-funny. I did like Really with Seth he did make good points.

  3. February 9, 2009 3:46 pm

    I like this episode it was funny.

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